The “mob wife aesthetic” has been blowing up across social media in recent weeks – it piqued our interest because we’ve definitely loved analyzing mob wives and girlfriends on screen in the past. But because we’re familiar with these characters, we also know that these mob wives usually don’t have very happy stories.

“Oh, my god. Christopher.” “It’s three carats.” The Sopranos

But interest in these women (and their fashion) is actually nothing new. And while any discussion of modern trends is bound to be hit with a chorus of “it’s not that deep!”, that doesn’t mean that it’s not interesting to unpack. So let’s take a deeper look at the three major aspects that make these characters and their outfits so alluring and impactful, and also why, while we might want to copy their looks, we probably don’t want to emulate their lives too closely.

“Nothing exceeds like excess.” Scarface

FASHION AS ARMOR

The heart of this trend is pretty vintage, harkening back to the looks of the 1980s; and it’s been bubbling up online for a few years now. But it’s really seen a recent explosion seemingly in reaction to more minimalist trends like clean girl and quiet luxury. Tired of being beige and calm, some people have been itching for something more – and so they began turning to maximalist trends like ‘cluttercore’ and the ‘mob wife’ aesthetic. The ‘Mob Wife’ name became an easy (and easily marketable) shorthand for a well known look: furs, leather, animal print, big jewelry, bigger hair. But why have people latched onto this look in such a big way?

Fashion functioning as a type of armor is a long held idea – it’s the one thing standing between you and the rest of the world, the way you can immediately announce who you are and what you’re about without having to say a word. And mob wives have to put up with some pretty wild stuff, so it makes sense that they’d have the armor to match.

“I’m a working girl, right? You think I went into this without making sure I’d be covered on the back end?” Casino

They’re brash and loud and not going to put up with anybody’s shit, and they want to make sure that everyone knows it up front. They won’t be made to feel small or less than by a world that seeks to hold them down or snuff out their inner light. And in a world filled with chaos and uncertainty, it makes sense that a lot of people would start finding a kind of comfort in that vibe. Obviously there is a lot about their stories that isn’t something anyone would want to emulate (we’ll get to that in a minute), but there is an allure to the power they seem to have.

We can see how this fascination plays out on Euphoria: Maddy is obsessed with Sharon Stone’s Ginger from Casino.

“Sharon stone in Casino was, like, Maddy’s spirit animal.” Euphoria

Ginger is beautiful and mysterious, drawing attention wherever she goes and always keeping herself focused on maintaining her image. Maddy follows suit, working to put out the image of an always-confident bad ass hottie, no matter how she might be feeling on the inside. Her outfits and makeup always exude 100% confidence, because she knows that how people perceive you is most of the battle.

“90% of life is confidence and the thing about confidence is that no one knows if it’s real or not.” Euphoria

But while Ginger has been hardened to the world by her circumstances, Maddy is actually still a pretty nice and caring person – she loves deeply and is loyal to the people she lets into her inner circle. And while Ginger meets a tragic end, Maddy still has hope that she’ll be able to grow beyond her current problems and get more out of life.

One other thing that Maddy found engaging about Ginger, and that seems to be a common thread in the interest in ‘mob wives’ as an aesthetic, is their power over men. For most mob wives and girlfriends on screen, their power isn’t innate to them through their own doing, but comes as a result of being connected to powerful men. And that they often seem able to wield their own authority over these incredibly dangerous, intense men make the women themselves feel even more powerful.

“Don’t call me baby. I’m not your baby.” Scarface

But, of course, when all of your influence comes from being associated with power players instead of being a power player yourself, you can get left on very shaky ground. Which leads us to the second, darker aspect of ‘mob wife’ fashion…

FASHION AS A BAND AID

People sometimes seem to glean a feeling of protection from mob wife and girlfriend stories – the idea that she’s kept safe from the crazy world by this big powerful guy who buys her whatever she wants… Even though in pretty much all of these stories we see that he actually treats her worse than anyone else, and all of those fancy presents aren’t really gifts but leverage. All of those furs and necklaces and rings aren’t given out of the kindness of his heart, but to buy her silence or apologize for some terrible deed.

“You have made a fool of me for years with these whores. Now it’s come into our home?” The Sopranos

The fur coat in particular has been used again and again as a metaphor for the covering up of transgressions with luxury. On screen, we see these women suffering mentally and often physically at the hands of these impossibly powerful men and becoming trapped in a cycle that’s hard to escape – all of their wealth and influence are tied to him, so if they leave, all of that is gone, too.

“I love my husband and I love God. But, my life is financed by crime. His crime.” The Sopranos

There can be a level of sex appeal to the dangerous mob world, at least at first. These characters often find it intoxicating to be pulled into this darkness, like they’re getting in on a delicious, secret side of his life that also adds a new sense of electricity to hers.

“I know there are women, like my best friends, who would have gotten out of there the minute their boyfriend gave them a gun to hide. But I didn’t. I got to admit the truth. It turned me on.” Goodfellas

But for these guys, danger and crime isn’t just a part of their world, it’s their whole life – and so it continues to loom over the relationship even when the wife or girlfriend wants to pretend everything is okay. While the mob wife has to constantly consider her husband’s desires and ego, she is always a second thought to him. He hypothetically puts family first, but when push comes to shove he’ll choose what he wants over her every time – and if she’s got a problem with it, he’ll remind her that she came into his world eyes wide open.

“The only reason you have anything is cause of my fuckin sweat, and you knew all along how it works.” The Sopranos

And the longer she’s in this world, the easier it gets to look the other way and allow herself to be placated by the life of luxury provided by the things she’s willing to ignore.

“After a while, it got to be all normal. None of it seemed like crime… Our husbands weren’t brain surgeons, they were blue-collar guys. The only way they could make extra money, real extra money, was to go out and cut a few corners.” Goodfellas

While the mob wife’s look might be loud aesthetically, it actually functions as a metaphor for how she’s meant to be seen, not heard. Mob wives and girlfriends on screen are meant to be beautiful objects through which the mob guy can signify his own ability and power – whether that means showing off the hottest girl in town or the most sensible, put together good wife… or often both. While they get to wield their husband’s influence on occasion, these women often don’t have a lot of agency in their lives. Their clothes are the one place that they do have some control, and so they make the most of it. One interesting thing about this style now coming into vogue as a symbol of personal power is that for a long time, mob wives and girlfriends were mocked for their gaudy fashions, called tacky and cheap looking even by people in their own circles.

“They all had bad skin and wore too much make up. They didn’t look very good; they look beat up. The stuff they wore were thrown together and cheap, a lot of pantsuits and double knits.” Goodfellas

Becoming the cliche of a mob wife was something that young women sought to avoid because of the connotations of the associated lifestyle and lack of agency.

“Why don’t you just forget about workin’ and be with me?” “Oh, yeah. And be one of those wives like Carmela Soprano?” The Sopranos

As associate professor of Italian at the Fashion Institute of Technology Rebecca Bauman told Teen Vogue, “Whereas at times mobsters have been portrayed as extravagant or gaudy in dress, they make up for it by retaining their authority and wielding power through the threat of violence, whereas for mob wives, their [choice of] clothing makes them [look] more pitiable because they do not have the same kind of social capital that their husbands have.”

But, of course, fashion and its meaning changes with time – the ‘mob wife aesthetic’ isn’t the first style with an originally negative connotation that’s been co-opted for a more positive and market-friendly version, and it surely won’t be the last. But it does open up an interesting conversation about the power we can create for ourselves through our fashion choices.

FASHION AS FREEDOM

Fashion is the one place these on screen mob wives and girlfriends have any real freedom to express themselves, and it can feel like that for a lot of us in the real world sometimes, too. So people latching onto this big, showy style that at least exudes power makes a lot of sense.

“You didn’t have to be the prettiest, or the tallest, or the blondest, or the whitest. You just had to have f*cking confidence.” Euphoria

It is, of course, important to remember that these on screen depictions aren’t real life – and can actually even push some harmful real life stereotypes. Do people actually want to be mob wives? Probably not. But with the way things work now, many people feel like they need to put some kind of label on everything, so it’s not surprising that sometimes we land on some odd ones. It’s one trend in a seemingly endless sea of TikTok trends, but there is something special about it that’s really captured people’s imaginations (or, according to some, it’s just gotten an extra boost from HBO around the 25th anniversary of The Sopranos, though that’s been pretty much debunked thanks to journalist Mona Kosar Abdi.

While the seemingly never ending churn of fashion trends certainly has its problems (both for the environment and our sanity,) it does have one benefit: giving people the opportunity to try out lots of different looks and see what works for them. If a big faux fur jacket and gold rimmed sunglasses helps someone find some inner confidence that sad beige oatmeal clothes didn’t, then great. As long as you just enjoy the look and don’t try to live the lifestyle, it’s fine to have a little fun.