Friend’s Ross Geller is a classic example of a ‘nice guy’ who regards his masculinity as under perpetual attack. He’s crafted a narrative about himself as someone who is unfairly overlooked, demeaned and emasculated, and then uses these things to justify the way he victimizes and mistreats others.
He gets upset whenever Rachel does something that challenges his idea of her being solely his (like, having a job?). He only cares about how she can fulfill him.
Ross’s narrative of himself is that he’s the adult in the group—but really he’s what historian Gary S. Cross identifies as a ‘boy-man,’ an ostensible grown-up who “fixates on adolescent longings for the intensity and variety of experience and escape.”
Despite being incredibly sensitive about his own feelings, Ross regularly shows himself to be insensitive and even intolerant toward others.
Can you believe we were supposed to find Rachel getting off the plane and giving up her dreams for this man romantic?